Hi Guys,

If anyone has some advise for me I would really appreciate it.

I have a somewhat related situation to “G”. I am turnig 27 at the end of this month and have been with the same boyfriend since I was 22. We have lived together for the past 3 1/2 years. My issue is whether it is worth the risk of leaving and dating someone else (you never know what you are going to get-let alone there is not much to choose from out there from my past experience) or if I should continue to “try” with this relationship.

I have stayed thus far because I have invested to much time, energy, and so much of myself into him and into building what I thought was going to be my life and future with him. I did this prematurely because I was so in love with him, but I really think that going out of my way for him so early on and so often has made him underappreciate me. I thought he was on the same page, but apparently he wasn’t.

He talked about proposing the past 3 summers but it never happend. Last spring he even went so far as to say how a close friend knew the details of how he was going to pop the question. However, when it seemed it wasn’t going to happen halfway through this past summer I asked him for an explanation of what is holding him back. He reluctantly told me that he has lied to me about a credit card debt that he owes because of his last girlfriend whom he bought many things for (a couch, jewlery, etc.). He could not afford the payments and defaulted on it and eventually was taken to court and a judgment was found against him for what he owed and now has taken out a loan to pay it. But that all happend behind my back with him directly lying about various stages of that process. I am salty about the whole situation. The fact that he hasn’t gone out of his way for me at all, even with cheap thoughtful things or with gifts or even with daily financial issues, and I was working and now I am a law student. His ex did drugs all day long and signed up for school just to get loan money then dropped out. I just don’t understand. I am hurt over his lies and using the lie of proposing marriage. I just wonder if he did that just to keep me holding on, thinking he would committ or that he actually loves me. I don’t know what to think now.

I do not know what to do. I have lost the love I had for him and I want to get it back but I just do not trust him.

The other issue is our sex life. Sex with him has never been consistent. When we first started he was coming off being on steriods for several years and I know that messed with his testosterone production and his ability. However, now it is still inconsistent (whether he can “cum”)even though he did improve somewhat. Lately, this is the longest we have gone without having sex, over a month. He did not try for a long time but then he started to try and hit on me but at this point I do not even want it. I am tired of his penis dictating when we can have sex since I can’t get it when I want it I just feel like why should his penis control out sex life. It makes me not trust him. I dont know. I know that this sounds convoluted but please help me if you can. Thank you.

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Last-modified: 2020-08-15 (土) 03:07:00 (106d)