While doing some research I happened up on this website and am enjoying it.
My involvement with a man that dipped in and out of my life did a lot of mental abuse that led to some counseling. Through this I learned that this behavior is a specialty of those with narcissistic personality disorder.
There is ample information on the Internet when searched for. These individuals are the master of the games they like to play at your expense. You may even find that you have been the recipient of things like "gaslighting".
Please educate yourselves on this personality disorder as it is estimated that 1 in 3 people have it.